I think one of the reasons they ask is that interpersonal skills are skills we use when we interact with people, and that there are so many different ways to interact that it’s difficult to define.

My take on this is that when our interaction [...]]]>

People sometimes ask me: “Tell me, what are interpersonal skills?”

I think one of the reasons they ask is that interpersonal skills are skills we use when we interact with people, and that there are so many different ways to interact that it’s difficult to define.

My take on this is that when our interaction with others gives us the result we want, and it gives the other person the result they want, we used our interpersonal skills successfully. I always aim at a win-win in any situation I’m in.

The thing is that we all have interpersonal skills. As we grow up and learn how to communicate with others, we learn ways to communicate and deal with people that are better than other ways.

Interpersonal skills have a lot to do with communication skills. That is because when we interact with others, we always communicate. These are skills we use every day. The question now is, are you using these skills in a way that creates more harmony between you and others?

Are you using these skills so that you and the other person get the results you want? I would call interpersonal skills relationship building skills. Because when we are with other people, we relate to them. And here, the question is: how well are you relating to other people?

There’s always room to improve your interpersonal skills, your communication skills, and your relationship building skills. And the better your interpersonal skills the more successful you are in your personal and professional life.

Do you know how to create that feeling of trust and understanding that we all crave from others?

Do know how to express your own needs so that the other person doesn’t feel attacked?

Do you know how to give emotional support to someone else, and in such a way that they can solve their own problem?

Do you know how to settle differences and disagreements so that nobody feels resentful about the outcome?

Interpersonal skills include assertiveness skills, listening skills, conflict resolution skills, problem solving skills. The most important skill though, in my opinion, is creating an atmosphere of mutual trust, respect and understanding. This skill alone allows you to get the other person to cooperate with you. It allows you to get what you want in such a way that the other person doesn’t feel resentful. Because when you do it right the other person gets what they want too. A real win-win…!

Technorati Tags: Communication, communication skills, interpersonal communication skills, Interpersonal Skills, relationships

Interpersonal communication is something most of us do on a daily basis, although we may not be aware that is what it is called.

Interpersonal communication differs from other forms of communication in various ways. It is also very important in development.

The following list outlines what interpersonal communication is and what some of the characterizes [...]]]>

Interpersonal communication is something most of us do on a daily basis, although we may not be aware that is what it is called.

Interpersonal communication differs from other forms of communication in various ways. It is also very important in development.

The following list outlines what interpersonal communication is and what some of the characterizes are. It also explains why we need it.

1. What is it?

Interpersonal communication involves a close group of participants. It is basically the everyday conversations you carry on and it includes speeches, general friendly exchanges, arguments and basically anytime you speak to someone.

2. How is it different than other forms of communication?

Interpersonal communication involves face to face encounters. You are talking in person not over a computer, phone or through written information. You can get immediate responses.

You are also able to benefit from body language. You hear a voice where you can pick up on different dialects and speech patterns.

3. How does interpersonal communication vary?

The variances in interpersonal communication involve the people and situations. You communicate differently with someone you know well verses a stranger. You will have different topics of conversation when talking to your preacher or your best friend.

These variations make interpersonal communication flexibility important for difference circumstances.

4. How do we use interpersonal communication?

We use interpersonal communication for a variety of reasons. You use it to learn new information, such as when asking questions. You use it to share information, such as when telling a story. You use it to define yourself, such as when giving a speech.

You also use it to fulfill the natural need for contact with other people. Interpersonal communication is how we develop from infant to adult. We learn about different cultures and languages through interpersonal communication as well. It gives you a human element, a real nature that other forms of communication can not provide.

5. Why is interpersonal communication important?

Interpersonal communication is important because you need it to develop throughout the stages of life. You get so much from interpersonal communication.

You learn, teach and get an identity through interpersonal communication. You also share with others who you are. You need interpersonal communication to learn how to pronounce words correctly, how to speak properly in certain situations and how to communicate in general.

Interpersonal communication has taken a back seat to other forms of communication in recent years. More people than ever are using the internet to exchange information and make contact with others.

We must also be sure to keep interpersonal communication in our lives. Without it babies will never learn to talk properly and we can never expand our language abilities through learning form others speech. The spoken word should never have its importance underestimated.

Peter Murphy
http://www.articlesbase.com/advice-articles/interpersonal-communication-secrets-that-work-every-time-10453.html

Technorati Tags: interpersonal communication, interpersonal conflict, Interpersonal Skills

Interpersonal Communications

Very few of us never have contact with the outside world or other people, and as a result, there is a relationship that is created whenever we interact with someone else. As time goes on, that relationship can remain stagnant, or as in the case of a love or dating relationship, that relationship [...]]]>

Interpersonal Communications

Very few of us never have contact with the outside world or other people, and as a result, there is a relationship that is created whenever we interact with someone else. As time goes on, that relationship can remain stagnant, or as in the case of a love or dating relationship, that relationship can grow and flourish. But the real key to any meaningful relationship is effective interpersonal communications between two people. That statement is every bit as true for interpersonal relationships as it is for business relationships, and also for the marital relationship between a husband and wife.

Effective interpersonal communications cannot be stressed enough, especially in a marriage relationship. In today’s world where both husband and wife are holding down at least full time if not part time jobs, things happen during the course of a normal day. But it is only at the end of the day when two people are relaxing that effective communications can take place. It doesn’t matter how mundane, since even in mundane conversation you can learn a lot about another person, understanding what is important to them, what irritates them, and things they find enjoyable.

Suppose your partner is depressed about something, whether financial stress, job pressures, or anything else. How much time do you give to your partner to improve the mood? If your answer is “none or not much”, you are running the risk of your relationship starting to deteriorate. The breakdown of a relationship does not happen overnight, but it is all these “missed opportunities” to show care, understanding, and support that all add up over time.

Respect is a key ingredient of any relationship. If you do not feel you can trust someone, your communications with them will be brief or nonexistent. There is no real relationship there. That type of relationship may be fine for the checkout clerk at the grocery store, but how many people have that kind of relationship with their spouse? The real answer to that question will probably scare you, but you have control over that and the fate of that relationship, even your marital relationship, rests squarely in your hands.

Trust is another key element of any relationship, which goes hand in hand with respect. You need to feel you can trust the person you are communicating with. If you don’t have a level of trust with that person, even your spouse, then your communications will reflect that lack of trust. You won’t elaborate on things you say, you won’t go into details, and you will subconsciously leave out information that may leave you vulnerable to a future rebuttal or even attack from the other person.

Many times, especially in a marriage relationship, the three key elements of a relationship (communication, trust and respect) slowly start to erode over time. It is typically not a conscious thing, but it can happen if both spouses are not aware that they need to keep all levels of these elements at peak values consistently. So what happens as these components start to degrade? That relationship can develop into an abusive relationship. This is particularly difficult in a marriage relationship – when the checkout clerk at the grocery store abuses you, you can report them to their management or you can just decide to shop somewhere else. But in a marriage relationship, it is not nearly as clear-cut at that, nor nearly as simple. The marriage equivalent of “shopping somewhere else” is divorce, which although being a very drastic step, is sometimes the best solution for both parties when the respect, the trust, and the interpersonal communications have degraded to the point where both parties are unwilling to put in enough time and effort that will be required to rebuild those elements.

Take care of your relationships and understand how you can improve them on a regular basis, and those relationships can grow and flourish over time, where you can gain comfort during the dark times and share your joys in the good times.

Jon Arnold
http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/how-to-improve-your-interpersonal-relationships-94793.html

Technorati Tags: interpersonal communication, interpersonal communications, interpersonal conflict, Interpersonal Skills

Do you have strong interpersonal skills or what some call essential people skills? These skills are considered to be soft skills within the training and development industry.

Unfortunately, interpersonal skills are not actively developed within the [...]]]>

Here is an article I came across by Leanne Hoagland-Smith on Interpersonal skills.Have a read as she has some interesting ideas.

Do you have strong interpersonal skills or what some call essential people skills? These skills are considered to be soft skills within the training and development industry.

Unfortunately, interpersonal skills are not actively developed within the K-16 educational process as much as they should be. There are 3 core competencies for individuals with truly extraordinary strong interpersonal skills.

The first competency is Goals. Having the ability for consistent goal setting and goal achievement is critical for personal, professional and organizational success. Goal setting is not actively taught within the K-16 educational system.

From my experiences, I believe that less than 5% of all adults have and use a proven goal setting system along with the necessary goal setting tools to get to where they desire to go. Having the competency of how to set and achieve goals is frankly irreplaceable.

Attitudes are the second competency within this triad of essentials for personal and organizational success. Great positive attitudes equal great positive results.

Some has said that attitudes are habit of thought. This is a simple, but revealing definition. Attitudes are the foundation for success. If you believe or think you can do something, you will do what is necessary to turn that belief or thought into reality. On the opposite side of the coin, if you believe or think you cannot do something, you will give up without even trying.

In the early 1950Â’s, the term self fulfilling prophecy was born. Attitudes are our self fulfilling prophecies. These habits of thought directly affect our self esteem and so many other parts of our personalities. Because attitudes are thoughts, you can choose them and use them to your advantage.

Finally, the third competency is Self Leadership Skills. Many strong interpersonal skills reside within this third competency. However there are some external personal skills such as time management that are also within this competency.

Self leadership skills are all about you as an individual leading yourself. How do you cope with failure or with success. How do you handle all of the challenges that you As you look towards your future, take the time to add new fuel or G.A.S. to your existing strong interpersonal skills. I believe that you will be truly amazed by the results.

Do you some simple, but honest ideas in how to improve yourself? Then you might be interested in the Three Missing Pieces for Organizational & Personal Success a combination e book and e workbook at http://www.processspecialist.com/e-books-htm This easy e book focuses on helping you with the 3 key areas of setting goals, understanding attitudes and self leadership skills.

Technorati Tags: communication skills, communication skills training, Interpersonal Skills

Our communication with others usually starts with our thoughts, resulting in words, tonality and body language. There are many ways to define “thoughts”, and one of them is how we use our senses internally.

We use our senses [...]]]>

Here is an article on ways that you can enhance your interpersonal communication skills by By Joel Seah.

Our communication with others usually starts with our thoughts, resulting in words, tonality and body language. There are many ways to define “thoughts”, and one of them is how we use our senses internally.

We use our senses outwardly to perceive the world, and inwardly to represent experience to ourselves. When recalling experiences, such as a time you went to the beach, what appears in your mind first? Maybe a picture of the beach would appear. Perhaps you hear the sounds of the waves and children playing, or the feeling of how relaxed you were just sitting by the sea.

When you ask a group of students to describe their form teacher, you could get a variety of answers. One student might recall the hairstyle and dressing first, followed by the teacher’s voice, and how he or she feels about the teacher’s lessons. Another might first recall that the teacher has a very deep and powerful voice, followed by how the teacher always makes the class feel interesting, and lastly, how the teacher looks.

This method of taking in and storing information in our minds, through our five senses (Seeing, hearing, feeling, taste and smell) is known as Representational Systems in Neuro Linguistic Programming. Having different preferred representational systems is also one reason why we encounter difficulties in getting our messages across to others sometimes.

If you are a visual person whose dominant sense is seeing, you will likely speak in a manner that include many pictures and visual words. A kinesthetic person on the other hand, will speak with many feeling words. Also, they will find it easier to relate to feeling words as compared to visual words.

A point to remember is that representational systems are not mutually exclusive. It is possible to recall a scene, and include the sounds and feelings simultaneously, though it is quite rare for all to be used together all the time. Most of us tend to have one or two representation systems that we prefer when thinking.

Also, it is possible to develop and improve. For example, a person who is mostly visual might have difficulty learning music initially. However, with practice, they can also develop the audio aspect of their representational systems.

So to conclude, if you want to build rapport with others and get them to understand you easily, take responsibility for the way you communicate and use words that are suitable for their preferred representational systems.

By Joel Seah

Of course there is so much more to having great interpersonal communication skills and if you use what Joel has told you in this article you’ll be well on your way …

Technorati Tags: communication skills, communication skills training, interpersonal communication skills

The reality is that being perceived as an expert communicator [...]]]>

What do you want when you communicate with somebody ?

The reality is that being perceived as an expert communicator should  NOT be your number 1 priority.

Realise that what you are looking for is  to have control of the response. Your response…

Your first priority when communicating is to be sure that what you are  saying has been understood. Until that happens everything else is completely irrelevant, simply  because you are not communicating.

The message is not getting through.

You also have a responsibility to understand what is being said to you. Without both of these  components you are still not communicating.

You are talking AT each other.

You are probably thinking well yes this is all very well but doesn’t the other person also have the same responsibilities to understand me. I mean hey, my view is important here too.

The answer is yes…and no

There are two parties to any communication and because you are here and reading this I assume that you want to improve the type of communication you’re having with other people. I assume that you want to improve the quality of your communication which may mean that you get better responses to your questions or deeper levels of truth or emotions.

Either way, whatever you want out of your communication It is your responsibility to ensure that you get the responses that you need.

If you want more truthfulness…

If you want to be respected more …

If you want to have more influence or more friends..

or

Any other type of response you can think of.

Remember…Only you are in charge of your brain.

And if you don’t think that you’re in charge of it, then who is and who decided you would let them control your thinking ? Think about that…Because if you can consider who is actually in charge of your thinking it means that you really are the one who is in charge of your thoughts.

Right !

That means that you  not only have the power to take control of what you think. You also get to decide what you say  and how you say it.

Your brain receives a massive amount of information from your ears and eyes and then it decides what that information means. Your mind decides what the messages that you get from the outside world mean and then it tells you about that message. It tells you by encoding that information as a belief. Another aspect that makes up your beliefs are your values.

Values are  powerful beliefs that you use to measure yourself against in terms of your results and also your actions. Another word for your values is your conscience. What you believe to be right and good.

So let’s imagine that you have had a message from your boss or your partner. The message says that they are not very happy about something you have done.

That message could be interpreted that you are a victim of circumstance and powerless to change your life for the better… That your boss dominates your life and change is beyond your control…Your partner is the one that makes the decisions for you and so they must be right.

The same information could also be interpreted that while your life is not exactly what you want, at the moment,  you have got lots of really big incentives to change it and “By golly you’re not going to let anything or anyone stop you from getting it…”

The thing you can understand here is that YOU are the one who decides what the information you receive means. And you are the one who decides what you will do with that meaning.

Here’s a little test for your beliefs and what they mean to you… 

I am assuming that you have a goal that you will get as a result of having better communication skills. Yes ?

Do your current beliefs and the meaning you have attached to them, get you closer to your goals or do they move you further away from them ? And if they are not supporting you in getting your goals is there something else you could believe that would be more useful ?

You have the power to make a choice. You can stick with what has not worked so far…You can keep on doing those things that frustrate you and upset you…

Or you can decide right now that as you realise you are reading this and as you become aware that you are understanding these words… you can change what you believe about anything  you want to.

Your whole life is just made up of thoughts. thoughts that come into and flow through your mind. And you get to decide whether you believe them or not and what you want to do about that.

And even when the thoughts  say you have no control…You can still ask them this question…

Says who, specifically ?

and just be aware of the answers that come to you.

Have [...]]]>

I recently came across this article by Rebecca Cherry on Dimensional Bliss and it seems to confirm what we teach on our NLP courses that the mind and body are in fact one system. it also lends weight to what is taught in Qui gong that we actually have three brains.

Have a read and then allow yourself to imagine all of the possible things that you can do with this learning

Recently, Neurophysicists have been astonished to discover that the Heart is more an organ of intelligence,

than (merely) the bodies’ main pumping station. More than half of the Heart is actually composed of neurons of the very same nature as those that make up the cerebral system. Joseph Chilton-Pearce, author of The Biology of Transcendence, calls it “the major biological apparatus within us and the seat of our greatest intelligence.”

The Heart is also the source of the body’s strongest electromagnetic field. Each heart cell is unique in that it not only pulsates in synchrony with all the other heart cells, but also produces an electromagnetic signal that radiates out beyond the cell. An EEG that measures brain waves shows that the electromagnetic signals from the heart are so much stronger than brain waves, that a reading of the heart’s frequency spectrum can be taken from three feet away from the body…without placing electrodes on it!

http://dimensionalbliss.com/2011/03/23/follow-your-heart-it-is-smarter-than-you-think/
Read more… Follow Your Heart, it is Smarter Than You Think

Have a read and then [...]]]>

I recently came across this on Dimensional Bliss and it seems to confirm what we teach on our NLP courses that the mind and body are in fact one system. it also lens weight to what is taught in Qui gong that we actually have three brains.

Have a read and then allow yourself to imagine all of the possible things that you can do with this learning

Recently, Neurophysicists have been astonished to discover that the Heart is more an organ of intelligence,

than (merely) the bodies’ main pumping station. More than half of the Heart is actually composed of neurons of the very same nature as those that make up the cerebral system. Joseph Chilton-Pearce, author of The Biology of Transcendence, calls it “the major biological apparatus within us and the seat of our greatest intelligence.”

The Heart is also the source of the body’s strongest electromagnetic field. Each heart cell is unique in that it not only pulsates in synchrony with all the other heart cells, but also produces an electromagnetic signal that radiates out beyond the cell. An EEG that measures brain waves shows that the electromagnetic signals from the heart are so much stronger than brain waves, that a reading of the heart’s frequency spectrum can be taken from three feet away from the body…without placing electrodes on it!

http://dimensionalbliss.com/2011/03/23/follow-your-heart-it-is-smarter-than-you-think/
Read more… Follow Your Heart, it is Smarter Than You Think

Have a read and then [...]]]>

I recently came across this on Dimensional Bliss and it seems to confirm what we teach on our NLP courses that the mind and body are in fact one system. it also lens weight to what is taught in Qui gong that we actually have three brains.

Have a read and then allow yourself to imagine all of the possible things that you can do with this learning

Recently, Neurophysicists have been astonished to discover that the Heart is more an organ of intelligence,

than (merely) the bodies’ main pumping station. More than half of the Heart is actually composed of neurons of the very same nature as those that make up the cerebral system. Joseph Chilton-Pearce, author of The Biology of Transcendence, calls it “the major biological apparatus within us and the seat of our greatest intelligence.”

The Heart is also the source of the body’s strongest electromagnetic field. Each heart cell is unique in that it not only pulsates in synchrony with all the other heart cells, but also produces an electromagnetic signal that radiates out beyond the cell. An EEG that measures brain waves shows that the electromagnetic signals from the heart are so much stronger than brain waves, that a reading of the heart’s frequency spectrum can be taken from three feet away from the body…without placing electrodes on it!

http://dimensionalbliss.com/2011/03/23/follow-your-heart-it-is-smarter-than-you-think/
Read more… Follow Your Heart, it is Smarter Than You Think